I literally just got home from picking up a trailer. On the way, I was making a tight turn, and had to let a large truck pull out before I could make the turn. The pickup behind the large truck decided he had the right to pull out too--but I had already committed to making the turn (not to mention that I had the right of way). As I passed the pickup, the driver decided to call me an "a*@wipe". I said, "sorry man" and even made eye contact (my voice was calm, and I was sincerely sorry--even though I really had nothing to apologize for. Remember, I had the right of way!). As I apologized, he decided to respond with the wonderful and uplifting comment of "F%*# You!"
As I continued down the road, I laughed--then I prayed. I thanked God for the fact that I held my tongue, and then I prayed for the man (No, I did not pray that he would then run off the road). I prayed for God's resurrecting power to be made known in the man's life. I prayed that his day would be better, and I prayed that he would be forgiven.
Now, I don't tell you this to pat myself on the back. I promise that I do not always respond this way, and I have had my share of opportunities to be "the other guy." I tell you this because the situation made me think about words. Why do we say the things we say to others? Why do we tear down complete strangers?
[Note: The man would have been accurate in calling me an "a*@wipe" if only he had said "a*@wiper"--considering we just had our third child, and I have been wiping a lot of....well--you know!!]
Ephesians 4:29 says, "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs."
Gut punch, right?!! It's one of those verses that we like to sling out when we are the one being spoken poorly to, but avoid when we have something nasty to say. As a follower of Jesus Christ, every single word that comes out of our mouths matters!! EVERY. SINGLE. WORD.
In this situation, the Spirit lead me to forgive, not lash out--which should be my response every time. I'm thankful that He intervened. I'm thankful that prior to being in my truck, I had been in conversation with God--thus I was in touch with the Spirit.
If we are truly to control our words, we must constantly be in touch with the Spirit. When we are hurt by words, we should immediately go to God so that our response comes from Him.
Christian--in a world of hurt, God, through the letters of Paul, has told us to only speak what builds up. My prayer is that you will allow the right words to flow from your lips in all circumstances.
Friday, September 11, 2015
Saturday, August 29, 2015
From Couch to Commitment
As a runner, it's been nice to see the recent boom in the sport. People of all shapes and sizes are out giving it their best. There has been tremendous event enhancement--color runs, zombie runs, 200 mile relays, and more.
One of my favorite additions to the running world is the "couch to 5k" app. This simplifies the training process, and literally turns a non runner into a racer! The one thing, though, that the app doesn't do is make the commitment. The individual must do that.
I've known people who were pumped to have downloaded the app, but have never used it. It's not the app that gets you off the couch!!
The same thing has happened in the church. The "boom" has happened more in the contemporary style churches. Loud music, flashing lights, skinny jeans (nothing wrong with any of these--however I do not do skinny jeans), etc. The church "event" has definitely been enhanced over the last decade.
One thing that hasn't changed though, is that the individual still has to make a decision to commit!! I'm not one to get hung up on which is right, traditional or contemporary, and I'm pretty sure Jesus isn't concerned with your worship style. I am sure, though, that He definitely wants commitment. He didn't die so we could own an app, take up space on a pew/really hip stadium seat, or simply be a member. He died so that we could have life, and the life that He gives only comes from complete surrender and commitment.
There are many "Christians" out there just like those "runners" that I know. They think that they are runners (or Christians) because of their association with the sport (or Church), and yet they have never gotten off the couch (or pew). They haven't made a real commitment.
Isn't it time to lace up, and get in the race?
Jesus paid it all, all to Him I owe; sin had left a crimson stain, He washed it white as snow.
One of my favorite additions to the running world is the "couch to 5k" app. This simplifies the training process, and literally turns a non runner into a racer! The one thing, though, that the app doesn't do is make the commitment. The individual must do that.
I've known people who were pumped to have downloaded the app, but have never used it. It's not the app that gets you off the couch!!
The same thing has happened in the church. The "boom" has happened more in the contemporary style churches. Loud music, flashing lights, skinny jeans (nothing wrong with any of these--however I do not do skinny jeans), etc. The church "event" has definitely been enhanced over the last decade.
One thing that hasn't changed though, is that the individual still has to make a decision to commit!! I'm not one to get hung up on which is right, traditional or contemporary, and I'm pretty sure Jesus isn't concerned with your worship style. I am sure, though, that He definitely wants commitment. He didn't die so we could own an app, take up space on a pew/really hip stadium seat, or simply be a member. He died so that we could have life, and the life that He gives only comes from complete surrender and commitment.
There are many "Christians" out there just like those "runners" that I know. They think that they are runners (or Christians) because of their association with the sport (or Church), and yet they have never gotten off the couch (or pew). They haven't made a real commitment.
Isn't it time to lace up, and get in the race?
Jesus paid it all, all to Him I owe; sin had left a crimson stain, He washed it white as snow.
Sunday, August 9, 2015
Evangelism is spelled LOVE
So I'm in the midst of prepping a sermon for next Sunday (8/16/15)...though I won't give all the details at this time--I would like to throw this nugget out there.
Evangelism is a word that makes most Christians run for the hills. "Why in the world would we want to get out of our comfort zone?" "You mean, you actually want me to talk to someone about Jesus--a stranger?" Yes, yes, and yes!!
Remember the old Batman and Robin shows from the late 60s (no, I wasn't around in the 60s--reruns baby!!) with the "Bam/Pow" fight words? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oEruYOORRk4 I think most of us believe that's how evangelism should be. You're supposed to hide behind the mailbox, light post, tree trunk, or some other object that doesn't really hide you, and jump out with a "BAM! Jesus loves you!!" Really, who doesn't want to sign up for that?! You're more likely to get "POWed" back or simply run the person off. But this is our image of evangelism, isn't it? And this is why most people are terrified when the topic is brought up (mentioning "evangelism" or "stewardship" is a sure fire way to clear a room of "Christians").
Jesus didn't jump out from behind a tree. He simply invited others into relationship. It was through that relationship that others got to know Him, and respond to Him. He just loved people right where they were--that's it. That's all He's asking us to do, love people. That's evangelism.
How do you evangelize (especially if hiding behind a mailbox is out of the question)? You practice loving people. You offer up what I like to call "You Matter Moments" to people (you can also call them "I See You Moments"). All you do is acknowledge people, and if you see them on a regular basis--you've begun a relationship. Once you've established that you are a guy or gal that cares (this is called building trust), you can begin to share more about why you are the way you are (that's the "BAM/POW" Jesus part, but a little less threatening).
That's it. Evangelism--BAM!
Evangelism is a word that makes most Christians run for the hills. "Why in the world would we want to get out of our comfort zone?" "You mean, you actually want me to talk to someone about Jesus--a stranger?" Yes, yes, and yes!!
Remember the old Batman and Robin shows from the late 60s (no, I wasn't around in the 60s--reruns baby!!) with the "Bam/Pow" fight words? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oEruYOORRk4 I think most of us believe that's how evangelism should be. You're supposed to hide behind the mailbox, light post, tree trunk, or some other object that doesn't really hide you, and jump out with a "BAM! Jesus loves you!!" Really, who doesn't want to sign up for that?! You're more likely to get "POWed" back or simply run the person off. But this is our image of evangelism, isn't it? And this is why most people are terrified when the topic is brought up (mentioning "evangelism" or "stewardship" is a sure fire way to clear a room of "Christians").
Jesus didn't jump out from behind a tree. He simply invited others into relationship. It was through that relationship that others got to know Him, and respond to Him. He just loved people right where they were--that's it. That's all He's asking us to do, love people. That's evangelism.
How do you evangelize (especially if hiding behind a mailbox is out of the question)? You practice loving people. You offer up what I like to call "You Matter Moments" to people (you can also call them "I See You Moments"). All you do is acknowledge people, and if you see them on a regular basis--you've begun a relationship. Once you've established that you are a guy or gal that cares (this is called building trust), you can begin to share more about why you are the way you are (that's the "BAM/POW" Jesus part, but a little less threatening).
That's it. Evangelism--BAM!
Friday, November 7, 2014
Oh, The Distractions
For starters, I've been reading Jen Hatmaker, Shane Claiborne, and the Bible. I highly recommend all of them (especially the last one!!). If you don't want to expose your thought process to change--don't read them (but really, do read them--because change is good!).
My life is full of distractions--this is nothing new. This is also not good for this ADD guy! Getting the job completed has never been an issue for me, but staying the course has. I often get sidetracked, and then realize that I'm off task. Distractions. They get me every time (as I'm writing this, I've answered two phone calls and responded to someone at the door).
As I've read the above books, I've come to the conclusion that we, the Church (especially in the U.S.A.), easily get distracted. We tend to get WAAAAAY off course--a lot! We put our focus on building projects, stewardship campaigns, membership numbers, curriculum selection, bad preachers (like the one's that talk prosperity or universalism all the day long), programs, defending our faith against homosexuality or defending it for certain businesses (like that all chicken restaurant, or that craft store), and distraction after distraction after distraction...
Not that some of the above aren't necessary, but none of them is the task. They are all distractions that keep us from the task (this is why I say the devil has an easy job in America--we get distracted too easily).
The task: Jesus says, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: Love your neighbor as yourself." He also says, "Therefore go and make disciples of all nations."
"Love" and "Go." That's the task. So simple, so pure. Yet, we would rather fill our lives with so many distractions that we don't have time to build loving relationships that could possibly produce salvation-like fruit, and we definitely don't have time to "go" anywhere other than where our overloaded schedule says.
I'm all for slowing down, for unplugging, and all that--but that's not the world we live in. My challenge to you is to simply stay on task, Church. Among the busyness--1) love God and love others (BTW: "others" includes everyone. This does not mean you condone all behavior. It does mean that you love--all people). 2) Be willing to "go" in a different direction if God directs you. This also requires that we listen to HIM.
So, Church (believers, Christians, Christ-followers, whatever we call ourselves now), do that!
Go love, before you get distracted.
My life is full of distractions--this is nothing new. This is also not good for this ADD guy! Getting the job completed has never been an issue for me, but staying the course has. I often get sidetracked, and then realize that I'm off task. Distractions. They get me every time (as I'm writing this, I've answered two phone calls and responded to someone at the door).
As I've read the above books, I've come to the conclusion that we, the Church (especially in the U.S.A.), easily get distracted. We tend to get WAAAAAY off course--a lot! We put our focus on building projects, stewardship campaigns, membership numbers, curriculum selection, bad preachers (like the one's that talk prosperity or universalism all the day long), programs, defending our faith against homosexuality or defending it for certain businesses (like that all chicken restaurant, or that craft store), and distraction after distraction after distraction...
Not that some of the above aren't necessary, but none of them is the task. They are all distractions that keep us from the task (this is why I say the devil has an easy job in America--we get distracted too easily).
The task: Jesus says, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: Love your neighbor as yourself." He also says, "Therefore go and make disciples of all nations."
"Love" and "Go." That's the task. So simple, so pure. Yet, we would rather fill our lives with so many distractions that we don't have time to build loving relationships that could possibly produce salvation-like fruit, and we definitely don't have time to "go" anywhere other than where our overloaded schedule says.
I'm all for slowing down, for unplugging, and all that--but that's not the world we live in. My challenge to you is to simply stay on task, Church. Among the busyness--1) love God and love others (BTW: "others" includes everyone. This does not mean you condone all behavior. It does mean that you love--all people). 2) Be willing to "go" in a different direction if God directs you. This also requires that we listen to HIM.
So, Church (believers, Christians, Christ-followers, whatever we call ourselves now), do that!
Go love, before you get distracted.
Friday, October 31, 2014
The Power Of A Story
My mornings usually (meaning...sometimes they don't) involve reading. My mind is fresh, or freshly jump started with several cups of coffee. Lately, I've been getting a good hour of reading in before the inevitable occurs...."DADDY"!!!???!!! penetrates the solitude of my environment, and reading is over.
Today, I sprinted upstairs to the side of my sweet three year old daughter's bed to assist in the "getting up" process. She typically wants to get right up, and have me carry her downstairs. Today was a bit different. She invited me in for a cuddle (I must take advantage of these offers, as they will disappear over time). Our dialogue:
Are you cold? I ask.
No, I'm scared. She replies.
Scared of what? I ask.
Scared of the dark. She answers.
I understand, sweetheart. There was a time when I was scared of the dark too, but you're ok. I assured her.
Daddy, tell me a story of when you were scared of the dark. She says.
I proceeded to share some stories of my childhood--times when the dark was scary, and how I was afraid that "things" would get me. I assured her that nothing ever "got me," and that the dark ended up not being as scary as I once had thought.
I find it interesting that my assurance that everything was okay was not enough. It was the story that comforted her. It was me being authentic and vulnerable. She didn't want my opinion on the dark. She wanted to know my experience with it. It was a sweet moment! It was real relationship.
We live in an over opinionated culture, one with very little depth and few stories (even though we all have one). When is the last time you shared your story? When is the last time you left your opinion on the shelf, and were vulnerable with your story? Who in your life is "afraid of the dark," and simply needs your story to be comforted? What doors could you open be telling your story?
Telling your story, being vulnerable and authentic, builds trust. Trust is what I want my daughter to have in me--because there are other parts of my story that I pray she will want to hear too.
"My mouth will tell of your righteous deeds, of your saving acts all day long--though I know not how to relate them all. I will come and proclaim your mighty acts, Sovereign Lord; I will proclaim your righteous deeds, yours alone. Since my youth, God, you have taught me, and to this day I declare your marvelous deeds. Even when I am old and gray, do not forsake me, my God, till I declare your power to the next generation, your mighty acts to all who are to come" Psalm 71:15-18
Today, I sprinted upstairs to the side of my sweet three year old daughter's bed to assist in the "getting up" process. She typically wants to get right up, and have me carry her downstairs. Today was a bit different. She invited me in for a cuddle (I must take advantage of these offers, as they will disappear over time). Our dialogue:
Are you cold? I ask.
No, I'm scared. She replies.
Scared of what? I ask.
Scared of the dark. She answers.
I understand, sweetheart. There was a time when I was scared of the dark too, but you're ok. I assured her.
Daddy, tell me a story of when you were scared of the dark. She says.
I proceeded to share some stories of my childhood--times when the dark was scary, and how I was afraid that "things" would get me. I assured her that nothing ever "got me," and that the dark ended up not being as scary as I once had thought.
I find it interesting that my assurance that everything was okay was not enough. It was the story that comforted her. It was me being authentic and vulnerable. She didn't want my opinion on the dark. She wanted to know my experience with it. It was a sweet moment! It was real relationship.
We live in an over opinionated culture, one with very little depth and few stories (even though we all have one). When is the last time you shared your story? When is the last time you left your opinion on the shelf, and were vulnerable with your story? Who in your life is "afraid of the dark," and simply needs your story to be comforted? What doors could you open be telling your story?
Telling your story, being vulnerable and authentic, builds trust. Trust is what I want my daughter to have in me--because there are other parts of my story that I pray she will want to hear too.
"My mouth will tell of your righteous deeds, of your saving acts all day long--though I know not how to relate them all. I will come and proclaim your mighty acts, Sovereign Lord; I will proclaim your righteous deeds, yours alone. Since my youth, God, you have taught me, and to this day I declare your marvelous deeds. Even when I am old and gray, do not forsake me, my God, till I declare your power to the next generation, your mighty acts to all who are to come" Psalm 71:15-18
Friday, April 20, 2012
Leaders are Readers
I'm not sure it can be said enough. If you are in a position of leadership, or are on track to a leadership role--you had better be reading. If you are not reading, your time at the top is more limited than you think.
Reading is growth. Remember John Maxwell's Law of the Lid? If you don't grow you put a lid on the opportunity for growth for those you lead. Reading is one of the highest priorities you should have as a leader.
Here is my current list: Generation iY, Entreleadership, Managing the Millennials, Co-Active Coaching, The Traveler's Gift, Who, Gifted Hands: the Ben Carson Story, and Quitter.
That's a very short list, but it keeps me focused on growing.
What are you reading? If you're not, let me encourage you to start. Simply carve out 30 minutes a day to begin with, and increase from there.
Don't put a cap on your abilities as a leader. Read!
"Here is the treasure chest of the world--the public library, or a bookstore" -Dr. Ben Carson
Reading is growth. Remember John Maxwell's Law of the Lid? If you don't grow you put a lid on the opportunity for growth for those you lead. Reading is one of the highest priorities you should have as a leader.
Here is my current list: Generation iY, Entreleadership, Managing the Millennials, Co-Active Coaching, The Traveler's Gift, Who, Gifted Hands: the Ben Carson Story, and Quitter.
That's a very short list, but it keeps me focused on growing.
What are you reading? If you're not, let me encourage you to start. Simply carve out 30 minutes a day to begin with, and increase from there.
Don't put a cap on your abilities as a leader. Read!
"Here is the treasure chest of the world--the public library, or a bookstore" -Dr. Ben Carson
Wednesday, March 21, 2012
Fertilize and Prune
According to Wikipedia:
Fertilizer (or fertiliser) is any organic or inorganic material of natural or synthetic origin (other than liming materials) that is added to a soil to supply one or more plant nutrients essential to the growth of plants.
Pruning is a horticultural practice involving the selective removal of parts of a plant, such as branches, buds, or roots. Reasons to prune plants include deadwood removal, shaping (by controlling or directing growth), improving or maintaining health.
Imagine a garden, full of succulent fruits and vegetables. Look at the detail of the river rock wall surrounding this stunning masterpiece. Think about the effort that went in to creating such a productive field of beauty. Can you see the gardener with his pruning shears as he delicately tends to each plant? Look at the elaborate fertilization system in place. It delivers just to right amount of nutrients to ensure proper maturation.
Now imagine the same garden without the gardener or the fertilization system. Look how weed ridden it is. The rock wall is crumbling, there are no signs of fruits or vegetables. I wonder how long it's been since someone actually tended this garden. How long will it survive? How will it and who will it benefit in this condition?
In reference to relationships, each of us has a garden. We fill our garden with all sorts of people. The question is, do we take the time to fertilize and prune our gardens? Are our relationships like the first or second image described above? Do our relationships produce fruit, or are they full of weeds?
Seven steps to a productive "relationship garden".
1) Always meet new people. You never know if they are an "essential nutrient" to you and others you know.
2) Set expectations with others. The relationship must have meaning deeper than weather or sports talk. How can you mutually benefit from the relationship?
3) Have some seasonal relationships. These come and go, but they always produce growth (a mentoring relationship).
4) Don't be afraid to "prune" out bad branches. Remember that pruning maintains health and directs growth. To be blunt: life is too short to get bogged down trying to revive a bad relationship at the expense of many great relationships. It's okay to be selective. Don't be a jerk, be honest with others -- it may do you both some good.
5) It's not all about you. Be like the gardener, have a committed heart and a desire to impact others.
6) Make time. Whether it is a spouse, child, colleague, or old friend, the relationship will not survive if not properly tended to.
7) Share what you know. A master gardener usually has an apprentice. Teach others the skills necessary to cultivate productive relationships.
What are some other ways to improve and build healthy relationships? Please share your thoughts.
Fertilizer (or fertiliser) is any organic or inorganic material of natural or synthetic origin (other than liming materials) that is added to a soil to supply one or more plant nutrients essential to the growth of plants.
Pruning is a horticultural practice involving the selective removal of parts of a plant, such as branches, buds, or roots. Reasons to prune plants include deadwood removal, shaping (by controlling or directing growth), improving or maintaining health.
Imagine a garden, full of succulent fruits and vegetables. Look at the detail of the river rock wall surrounding this stunning masterpiece. Think about the effort that went in to creating such a productive field of beauty. Can you see the gardener with his pruning shears as he delicately tends to each plant? Look at the elaborate fertilization system in place. It delivers just to right amount of nutrients to ensure proper maturation.
Now imagine the same garden without the gardener or the fertilization system. Look how weed ridden it is. The rock wall is crumbling, there are no signs of fruits or vegetables. I wonder how long it's been since someone actually tended this garden. How long will it survive? How will it and who will it benefit in this condition?
In reference to relationships, each of us has a garden. We fill our garden with all sorts of people. The question is, do we take the time to fertilize and prune our gardens? Are our relationships like the first or second image described above? Do our relationships produce fruit, or are they full of weeds?
Seven steps to a productive "relationship garden".
1) Always meet new people. You never know if they are an "essential nutrient" to you and others you know.
2) Set expectations with others. The relationship must have meaning deeper than weather or sports talk. How can you mutually benefit from the relationship?
3) Have some seasonal relationships. These come and go, but they always produce growth (a mentoring relationship).
4) Don't be afraid to "prune" out bad branches. Remember that pruning maintains health and directs growth. To be blunt: life is too short to get bogged down trying to revive a bad relationship at the expense of many great relationships. It's okay to be selective. Don't be a jerk, be honest with others -- it may do you both some good.
5) It's not all about you. Be like the gardener, have a committed heart and a desire to impact others.
6) Make time. Whether it is a spouse, child, colleague, or old friend, the relationship will not survive if not properly tended to.
7) Share what you know. A master gardener usually has an apprentice. Teach others the skills necessary to cultivate productive relationships.
What are some other ways to improve and build healthy relationships? Please share your thoughts.
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