Continuous Transformation

He is the one we proclaim, admonishing and teaching everyone with all wisdom, so that we may present everyone fully mature in Christ.  Colossians 1:28

I was reading an online devotional today that referenced a wood worker carving and shaping a piece of wood.  The wood worker cuts away the parts that are not the finished product.  Eventually, after many days (depending on the size of the original piece of wood), he steps back to see the finished piece--what he had envisioned from the start.

Oftentimes we think of our spiritual development as something that just happens over night.  We proclaim Christ one day, and are immediately transformed.  This would be awesome, but is not the case at all.  Many of us come into relationship with Christ like a bulky stump comes to the wood worker.  We see something useless, He sees, behind the junk, something beautiful--an original design that He's had in mind from the beginning.

Just like the stump may have bark, knots, or gaps that need to be carved out--we too have stuff.  It takes time, but it also takes vulnerability.  We must be willing to allow Christ to cut away, carve out, the stuff that doesn't belong in what He sees.  If we proclaim Him, we should allow Him to work on us.  Full maturity comes from Him shaping us--over time.

What bark or knots need to be carved out of your life?  How are you getting in the way of the chisel? Are you letting Him, the master wood worker, shape you into His design--the very best you there could possibly be? 

WORDS

I literally just got home from picking up a trailer.  On the way, I was making a tight turn, and had to let a large truck pull out before I could make the turn.  The pickup behind the large truck decided he had the right to pull out too--but I had already committed to making the turn (not to mention that I had the right of way).  As I passed the pickup, the driver decided to call me an "a*@wipe".  I said, "sorry man" and even made eye contact (my voice was calm, and I was sincerely sorry--even though I really had nothing to apologize for. Remember, I had the right of way!).  As I apologized, he decided to respond with the wonderful and uplifting comment of "F%*# You!"

As I continued down the road, I laughed--then I prayed.  I thanked God for the fact that I held my tongue, and then I prayed for the man (No, I did not pray that he would then run off the road).  I prayed for God's resurrecting power to be made known in the man's life.  I prayed that his day would be better, and I prayed that he would be forgiven. 

Now, I don't tell you this to pat myself on the back.  I promise that I do not always respond this way, and I have had my share of opportunities to be "the other guy."  I tell you this because the situation made me think about words.  Why do we say the things we say to others?  Why do we tear down complete strangers? 

[Note:  The man would have been accurate in calling me an "a*@wipe" if only he had said "a*@wiper"--considering we just had our third child, and I have been wiping a lot of....well--you know!!]

Ephesians 4:29 says, "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs."

Gut punch, right?!!  It's one of those verses that we like to sling out when we are the one being spoken poorly to, but avoid when we have something nasty to say.  As a follower of Jesus Christ, every single word that comes out of our mouths matters!!  EVERY. SINGLE. WORD.

In this situation, the Spirit lead me to forgive, not lash out--which should be my response every time.  I'm thankful that He intervened.  I'm thankful that prior to being in my truck, I had been in conversation with God--thus I was in touch with the Spirit.

If we are truly to control our words, we must constantly be in touch with the Spirit.  When we are hurt by words, we should immediately go to God so that our response comes from Him.

Christian--in a world of hurt, God, through the letters of Paul, has told us to only speak what builds up.  My prayer is that you will allow the right words to flow from your lips in all circumstances.

From Couch to Commitment

As a runner, it's been nice to see the recent boom in the sport.  People of all shapes and sizes are out giving it their best.  There has been tremendous event enhancement--color runs, zombie runs, 200 mile relays, and more.

One of my favorite additions to the running world is the "couch to 5k" app.  This simplifies the training process, and literally turns a non runner into a racer!  The one thing, though, that the app doesn't do is make the commitment.  The individual must do that.

I've known people who were pumped to have downloaded the app, but have never used it.  It's not the app that gets you off the couch!!

The same thing has happened in the church.  The "boom" has happened more in the contemporary style churches.  Loud music, flashing lights, skinny jeans (nothing wrong with any of these--however I do not do skinny jeans), etc.  The church "event" has definitely been enhanced over the last decade.

One thing that hasn't changed though, is that the individual still has to make a decision to commit!!  I'm not one to get hung up on which is right, traditional or contemporary, and I'm pretty sure Jesus isn't concerned with your worship style.  I am sure, though, that He definitely wants commitment.  He didn't die so we could own an app, take up space on a pew/really hip stadium seat, or simply be a member.  He died so that we could have life, and the life that He gives only comes from complete surrender and commitment.

There are many "Christians" out there just like those "runners" that I know.  They think that they are runners (or Christians) because of their association with the sport (or Church), and yet they have never gotten off the couch (or pew).  They haven't made a real commitment.

Isn't it time to lace up, and get in the race?

Jesus paid it all, all to Him I owe; sin had left a crimson stain, He washed it white as snow.

Evangelism is spelled LOVE

So I'm in the midst of prepping a sermon for next Sunday (8/16/15)...though I won't give all the details at this time--I would like to throw this nugget out there.

Evangelism is a word that makes most Christians run for the hills.  "Why in the world would we want to get out of our comfort zone?"  "You mean, you actually want me to talk to someone about Jesus--a stranger?" Yes, yes, and yes!!

Remember the old Batman and Robin shows from the late 60s (no, I wasn't around in the 60s--reruns baby!!) with the "Bam/Pow" fight words? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oEruYOORRk4  I think most of us believe that's how evangelism should be.  You're supposed to hide behind the mailbox, light post, tree trunk, or some other object that doesn't really hide you, and jump out with a "BAM! Jesus loves you!!"  Really, who doesn't want to sign up for that?!  You're more likely to get "POWed" back or simply run the person off.  But this is our image of evangelism, isn't it?  And this is why most people are terrified when the topic is brought up (mentioning "evangelism" or "stewardship" is a sure fire way to clear a room of "Christians").

Jesus didn't jump out from behind a tree.  He simply invited others into relationship.  It was through that relationship that others got to know Him, and respond to Him.  He just loved people right where they were--that's it.  That's all He's asking us to do, love people.  That's evangelism.

How do you evangelize (especially if hiding behind a mailbox is out of the question)?  You practice loving people.  You offer up what I like to call "You Matter Moments" to people (you can also call them "I See You Moments").  All you do is acknowledge people, and if you see them on a regular basis--you've begun a relationship.  Once you've established that you are a guy or gal that cares (this is called building trust), you can begin to share more about why you are the way you are (that's the "BAM/POW" Jesus part, but a little less threatening).

That's it.  Evangelism--BAM!

Oh, The Distractions

For starters, I've been reading Jen Hatmaker, Shane Claiborne, and the Bible.  I highly recommend all of them (especially the last one!!).  If you don't want to expose your thought process to change--don't read them (but really, do read them--because change is good!).

My life is full of distractions--this is nothing new.  This is also not good for this ADD guy!  Getting the job completed has never been an issue for me, but staying the course has.  I often get sidetracked, and then realize that I'm off task.  Distractions.  They get me every time (as I'm writing this, I've answered two phone calls and responded to someone at the door).

As I've read the above books, I've come to the conclusion that we, the Church (especially in the U.S.A.), easily get distracted.  We tend to get WAAAAAY off course--a lot!  We put our focus on building projects, stewardship campaigns, membership numbers, curriculum selection, bad preachers (like the one's that talk prosperity or universalism all the day long), programs, defending our faith against homosexuality or defending it for certain businesses (like that all chicken restaurant, or that craft store), and distraction after distraction after distraction...

Not that some of the above aren't necessary, but none of them is the task.  They are all distractions that keep us from the task (this is why I say the devil has an easy job in America--we get distracted too easily).

The task: Jesus says, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.  This is the first and greatest commandment.  And the second is like it: Love your neighbor as yourself."  He also says, "Therefore go and make disciples of all nations." 

"Love" and "Go."  That's the task.  So simple, so pure.  Yet, we would rather fill our lives with so many distractions that we don't have time to build loving relationships that could possibly produce salvation-like fruit, and we definitely don't have time to "go" anywhere other than where our overloaded schedule says.

I'm all for slowing down, for unplugging, and all that--but that's not the world we live in.  My challenge to you is to simply stay on task, Church.  Among the busyness--1) love God and love others (BTW: "others" includes everyone.  This does not mean you condone all behavior.  It does mean that you love--all people).  2) Be willing to "go" in a different direction if God directs you.  This also requires that we listen to HIM.

So, Church (believers, Christians, Christ-followers, whatever we call ourselves now), do that!

Go love, before you get distracted.

The Power Of A Story

My mornings usually (meaning...sometimes they don't) involve reading.  My mind is fresh, or freshly jump started with several cups of coffee.  Lately, I've been getting a good hour of reading in before the inevitable occurs...."DADDY"!!!???!!! penetrates the solitude of my environment, and reading is over.

Today, I sprinted upstairs to the side of my sweet three year old daughter's bed to assist in the "getting up" process.  She typically wants to get right up, and have me carry her downstairs.  Today was a bit different.  She invited me in for a cuddle (I must take advantage of these offers, as they will disappear over time).  Our dialogue:

Are you cold? I ask.
No, I'm scared. She replies.
Scared of what? I ask.
Scared of the dark. She answers.
I understand, sweetheart.  There was a time when I was scared of the dark too, but you're ok. I assured her.
Daddy, tell me a story of when you were scared of the dark. She says.

I proceeded to share some stories of my childhood--times when the dark was scary, and how I was afraid that "things" would get me.  I assured her that nothing ever "got me," and that the dark ended up not being as scary as I once had thought. 

I find it interesting that my assurance that everything was okay was not enough.  It was the story that comforted her.  It was me being authentic and vulnerable.  She didn't want my opinion on the dark.  She wanted to know my experience with it.  It was a sweet moment!  It was real relationship.

We live in an over opinionated culture, one with very little depth and few stories (even though we all have one).  When is the last time you shared your story?  When is the last time you left your opinion on the shelf, and were vulnerable with your story?  Who in your life is "afraid of the dark," and simply needs your story to be comforted?  What doors could you open be telling your story?

Telling your story, being vulnerable and authentic, builds trust.  Trust is what I want my daughter to have in me--because there are other parts of my story that I pray she will want to hear too.

"My mouth will tell of your righteous deeds, of your saving acts all day long--though I know not how to relate them all. I will come and proclaim your mighty acts, Sovereign Lord; I will proclaim your righteous deeds, yours alone.  Since my youth, God, you have taught me, and to this day I declare your marvelous deeds.  Even when I am old and gray, do not forsake me, my God, till I declare your power to the next generation, your mighty acts to all who are to come"  Psalm 71:15-18

Leaders are Readers

I'm not sure it can be said enough.  If you are in a position of leadership, or are on track to a leadership role--you had better be reading.  If you are not reading, your time at the top is more limited than you think.

Reading is growth.  Remember John Maxwell's Law of the Lid?  If you don't grow you put a lid on the opportunity for growth for those you lead.  Reading is one of the highest priorities you should have as a leader.

Here is my current list:  Generation iY, Entreleadership, Managing the Millennials, Co-Active Coaching, The Traveler's Gift, Who, Gifted Hands: the Ben Carson Story, and Quitter.

That's a very short list, but it keeps me focused on growing. 

What are you reading?  If you're not, let me encourage you to start.  Simply carve out 30 minutes a day to begin with, and increase from there.

Don't put a cap on your abilities as a leader. Read!



"Here is the treasure chest of the world--the public library, or a bookstore" -Dr. Ben Carson

Fertilize and Prune

According to Wikipedia:

Fertilizer (or fertiliser) is any organic or inorganic material of natural or synthetic origin (other than liming materials) that is added to a soil to supply one or more plant nutrients essential to the growth of plants.

Pruning is a horticultural practice involving the selective removal of parts of a plant, such as branches, buds, or roots. Reasons to prune plants include deadwood removal, shaping (by controlling or directing growth), improving or maintaining health.

Imagine a garden, full of succulent fruits and vegetables.  Look at the detail of the river rock wall surrounding this stunning masterpiece.  Think about the effort that went in to creating such a productive field of beauty.  Can you see the gardener with his pruning shears as he delicately tends to each plant?  Look at the elaborate fertilization system in place.  It delivers just to right amount of nutrients to ensure proper maturation.

Now imagine the same garden without the gardener or the fertilization system.  Look how weed ridden it is.  The rock wall is crumbling, there are no signs of fruits or vegetables.  I wonder how long it's been since someone actually tended this garden.  How long will it survive?  How will it and who will it benefit in this condition?

In reference to relationships, each of us has a garden.  We fill our garden with all sorts of people.  The question is, do we take the time to fertilize and prune our gardens?  Are our relationships like the first or second image described above?  Do our relationships produce fruit, or are they full of weeds?

Seven steps to a productive "relationship garden".

1) Always meet new people.  You never know if they are an "essential nutrient" to you and others you know.

2) Set expectations with others.  The relationship must have meaning deeper than weather or sports talk.  How can you mutually benefit from the relationship?

3) Have some seasonal relationships.  These come and go, but they always produce growth (a mentoring relationship).

4) Don't be afraid to "prune" out bad branches.  Remember that pruning maintains health and directs growth.  To be blunt: life is too short to get bogged down trying to revive a bad relationship at the expense of many great relationships.  It's okay to be selective.  Don't be a jerk, be honest with others -- it may do you both some good.

5) It's not all about you.  Be like the gardener, have a committed heart and a desire to impact others.

6) Make time.  Whether it is a spouse, child, colleague, or old friend, the relationship will not survive if not properly tended to.

7) Share what you know.  A master gardener usually has an apprentice.  Teach others the skills necessary to cultivate productive relationships.

What are some other ways to improve and build healthy relationships?  Please share your thoughts.

Politico is not influencing positively

Where are all the statesMEN?  What is politics teaching young Americans about honor, respect, the value of man, the list goes on and on??

I barely recall a time when being an elected official was an honorable opportunity.  A man had the ability to make a positive difference.  Now, the political machine takes a man and wrings every ounce of goodness out of him. 

Why is it that when our three year old acts out we reprimand him, but we don't show him that we have the same expectation of our elected officials?  We're teaching that disciple is temporary.

Let me say this--discipline and selflessness are required for any amount of success in any area of life.

If you want a successful marriage, you must be disciplined to love unconditionally.
If you want a successful business, you must be disciplined to select great talent, train and develop, think outside the box, etc.
If you want a successful portfolio, you must be disciplined to understand the changing markets.
If you want to be successful at knowing your Maker,......well discipline's root is disciple?


Maybe I live in a hole, but I still believe that a man can be married to the same woman forever, can be an amazing and engaged father, and can have a positive influence on every single person he comes in contact with. 

There is no greater time than right now, leaders, to create more of these men!

The question is, are you disciplined and selfless enough to create them? 

Getting Better

Are you a leader?  Do you see your job as developing others?  Do you use words such as growth minded, invest in, develop, lead, teamwork, etc?

If you answered "YES" to the above then you should be applying these ideals daily AND you should be getting better at them daily.

I once worked with individuals and have known others who religiously taught leadership, so much so that they neglected to apply the same principles to themselves.  It is an easy trap to fall into.  Leaders should never talk so much that they don't walk.

In his book The 7 Levels of Change Rolf Smith writes "to get better results, you have to do things better."  Oftentimes as leaders, we get so hung up on the better results that we forget to "doing" part. 

Statistics show that it takes 10,000 hours of "doing" to become an expert at something.  That's A LOT of hours.  Think about the best professional athletes out there.  What do they do after the golf round, track meet, or football game?  They practice!  How serious are you about practice, leader?

How does a leader practice?  Reading.  We all knew that was the answer, because we're really good at having the answer.  What we're not all really good at is the "doing" or the action part. 

If you're not reading, you're not growing.  If YOU are not growing, you're definitely not growing others.  When you reach the top, the leadership role---when you're the captain of your organization--you're expected to be the expert (remember---10,000 hours = expert).

Back to Smith's book.  How are you doing things better?  Where are you carving out time to get better at becoming a better "doer".  I bet you can find 15 hours in a week to invest in becoming an expert. 

The question is, are you willing to be a better leader?

Change

Often times we hear the word change and we stall.  Change strikes fear.  Change causes us to question whether something was "wrong" to begin with.  Why fix it if it ain't broke? Right?

Though we fear change, we are also very curious about it.  The new year is always filled with grand allusions of the changes we will make in our lives.  We get enthralled with the idea of changing--but we don't.

On the other hand we recognize that change is needed.  Insanity has been defined as doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.  We believe it is insane to not change, (I need to exercise more, eat better, read more, work less, etc....or else "x" will happen....) yet are insane because we do not.

Why do we do this.... all the time?

I believe that "change" strikes fear because we think it requires some complete overhaul of who we are, though most haven't even defined that yet.  So therein lies the greater issue for 2012.  Who are you? What are your values?

Before you waste time chasing a new year "change", take the time to define YOU.  Once you define who you are and determined your values, you will be able to set clearer--more achievable goals.  For once, put the cart behind the horse, you'll have a great success rate!

When you've finally defined you by establishing the non-negotiable values that make you up--you can focus on change.  Change then becomes growth, not an abandonment of your values (which is what we feared to begin with).  Values are constant, the change in your life should be filtered through those values.  

Be resolute to set values first in 2012, then determine what "change" needs to take place. 

Face 2 Face

I recently had the pleasant reminder of what a real conversation felt like.  As a leader, I often get so consumed with the day to day operation of work.  The day is spent communicating, but usually through a screen (texting, emailing, twitter, etc) and very quickly.  Decisions need to be made and goals need to be met.

I reached out to a friend through a Words with Friends game---yes I dabble in fun apps occasionally in rare down time.  When we met up he said to me, "we have communicated more in the last two months, texting through a game, than we have all year.  What's wrong with that picture?"  The conversation that ensued was rich and genuine.  We each took turns sharing our passions.  We challenged one another in our careers.  After two hours, we both walked away encouraged and recharged to do what we do: develop people.  I see it as time well spent.

Jim Collins, author of the best-seller Good to Great, schedules "white space" on his calendar.  This is think time, brainstorming time, growth time.  It is time every leader should make.  Leaders should also schedule "face time."  Face time is just like Collins' "white space" plus one.  It is authentic conversation with another--on purpose.  Face time doesn't have an agenda or a direction.  The only rule is that it cannot be surface talk: nothing about the weather, sports, catching up on family, etc.  You must dig deeper, ask questions, generate ideas.

When is the last time you had real face time?  Reward yourself by scheduling it two to four times each month.  Don't allow face to face communication to become a lost art.

Take a break from the screens, and enjoy the conversation.

Going the distance

For years I have been a long distance runner...

One of the main reasons running is my "thing" is because of how much it reminds me that all of life requires patience, practice, and discipline--over and over and over and over again.  Running is great perspective.


I began running in high school.  I did well for our school, but never really put in the effort to be great.  I could show up at a 5k and submit a sub 19 minute time almost every time.  After graduation, I stopped--though I think about what could have been a lot.

During my senior year (or super senior year) in college I started running again.  I decided that I liked it, and it was good exercise.  From that point on I began entering the occasional 5k, then 10k.  I capped myself to doing nothing more than the 10k for several years.

In 2009 I ran my first half marathon, and again in 2010.  I remember thinking that 13.1 was crazy.  I was asked afterwards if I would ever consider doing a full--my answer was "no way".  Well, last weekend I finished my first (and NOT last) full marathon.  Did I just say that?  26.2 miles of running is insane!

Back to perspective:

We all have hopes and dreams, but many of us fail to ever reach them.  Many times we simply allow those dreams to remain a dream, convincing ourselves that it will never be possible.  Sometimes we set a goal to reach a dream by a specific date, but never allow it to gain any traction by neglecting to take action. 

Making a dream reality is like finishing a race--you have to have a plan.  You don't go run 26.2 miles without having readily prepared to do so.  In my case, I spent years getting up the courage to run a full marathon.  Once I decided to do it, I had 16 weeks of intense training.  I had a very specific plan that, if followed correctly, would yield success.

The issue that most of us face is not dreaming the dream, or even deciding to reach for it.  The roadblock we often run into is the "training", the diligent work, the practice, patience, and discipline over and over and over again.

A dream is just a dream, a goal just a goal, a vision just a vision--unless YOU are willing to breath life into it in the form of action.

6 simple steps to going the distance:

1) Dream it
2) Set a "complete by" date (this could be days or years)
3) Determine what disciplines need to be in place (what you do daily, weekly, monthly to stay on track)
4) Set small goals along the way (you'll need a "win" or two to keep you motivated)
5) Revisit the original plan, track action to your disciplines--make adjustments (allow yourself to call an audible)
6) Cross the finish line (you may even get yourself a medal!)

Planning and doing, planning and doing, planning and doing--that's all it is.  Now go out there and win!  Remember: Life is a marathon, not a sprint.

Winning at its best

Lots of businesses and individuals strive to be the best.  Pushing, conquering, rising to the top is an exhilarating experience.  However you must be focused on the path you leave behind you as you rise.

I was recently researching a specific type of certification from two industry leading training programs.  On their websites, each program listed the reason why they are the "best" in the world.  Both have great qualifications, and seem to be amazing.  One, though, was constantly comparing themselves to the other--almost to the point of bashing.  By the end of my research, I was completely disgusted with the "bashing" company.  My decision was made easily.

I often wonder why so many businesses, athletes, politicians, and people in general seek gain at the expense of tearing others down.  The end result, though it may be years, is downfall.  We see this all the time, yet it continues to occur.

Consider this in your journey to become great:

• Keep your focus on becoming the very "best" you.

• Be mindful and appreciative of your competition.  Don't get sucked into the trap of comparison--you will lose your focus.

• You can become the "best" without leaving a path of destruction along the way.

• A winning attitude from the onset is what consumers really want to see-- you will ultimately win their dollars too!